Dia listened in rapt attention to these instructions. She's a big believer in all things magical. She even considers herself to be a fairy princess, though contends that she hasn't received her wings yet nor any magic since she hasn't completed the full course of fairy hopscotch. As far as I can decipher, fairy hopscotch is much like Jedi training and has nothing to do with hopping, squares or throwing pebbles. Regardless, she hasn't conquered that crucial next step in fairy-dom, so she is an apt student and a welcome recipient of magic from other sources.
I watched as she took it all in, ever serious. I saw her place her hands on the well's walls. She bowed her head as if in prayer, closed her eyes ... tighter, tighter ... She relaxed a bit and began again. The first wish must have been completed. She repeated the process, opened her eyes and clapped twice.
As we walked back down to the lower barns, where a birthday party feast was awaiting us, she held my hand. "I can't tell you what I wished for, you know."
"I know." I assured her. (I knew the rules.)
"Well, I can tell you what I wished for Katya." she considered.
"OK"
"I wished that she will love the present I got her."
I told her how sweet of a wish that was and smiled. She's always taken the role of such things very seriously. She considers the gifts she chooses so incredibly carefully and always worries that they might not be exactly right. It was so "Dia" to wish that Katya would love her gift.
She interrupted my thoughts. "I think it's OK to tell you what I wished for too." she said.
"It would be an honor to hear it."
"I wished that I would never be sick again. A little girl once wished on that wishing well for this" she swept her arms around to illustrate the 'this' she was referring to "and that wish came true. Maybe my wish can come true too."
"I wish that too, darlin'." I said.
We were to the party by that time. There wasn't anyone there, really, to share the moment with and, besides, the way I felt about it at the time was hardly festive. All that we've been through over the past few weeks have made me realize how daunting life can be. Even here, in amongst these blog pages, I've wished for love, admitted that I've wished for 'more,' and certainly in my heart I've wished for money, for nicer things, for a skinnier body, for a younger face. Yet, when your body fails you - or worse, when your child's body fails them - all those things seem irrelevant. It comes down to one thing. You wish them well again.
So I do wish that for Dia. I just also wish, at just 6 years old, she didn't feel the need to wish that too.
-kec
It really puts things into perspective for you when your child's biggest wish in life is simply not to be sick. While you can help with many aspects of that, healthy diet, exercise, doctor's visits and tests as necessary, it's something that no matter how much time, love, and money you have to give them, you simply can't control. It breaks your heart to hear that but really that's exactly what you wish for her too. Dia is such a sweet, caring, and smart girl, she knows what's important. Next time I find myself at a wishing well, I'll put in a good wish for her too. :)
ReplyDeleteI feel so blessed to have the Szerman family in our lives. Your calm and introspective approach to life is such an inspiration to me. Thank you in advance for the wishes!
DeleteI really feel that we are the lucky ones to have gotten to meet you and your family. There are always members of a family that aren't as likeable as the others but so far I've really enjoyed everyone I've met in yours. You must be hiding a crazy uncle in the closet somewhere. We would really like to come join you for a Sunday family dinner sometime soon.
Delete