An Ode to Thigh Gap

What light though yonder thighs once broke

That skin and fat and age now choke

Tis the rub and sticky heat

That madden me now that they meet.

Lo Talc! In you I put my faith

To spare me from this cursed chafe

Yet thine evidence in powd'ry snow

On all my wears of black doth show.

Fitness Lords, why doth ye lie?
These moves dare not reshape mine thighs.

Nay, ev’ry plié and plyometric squat

Causes me to wish in Hell you’d rot.

And now as I peer in the glass

To see the fate befallen mine ass

Once small and round and firm and high

Now sits deflated upon mine thighs.

This road of life tarries on, forsooth

Alas, I must now visage the truth

Twas never so before, and yet?

Twould seem my thighs hast truly met.